Smelly Monkey
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Porn Jesus
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Reged: 01/26/04
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Posts: 8384
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Loc: In a k1ng like state of mediocrity
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Tom Sizemore beyond delusional
#119782 - 10/23/05 12:07 AM
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I saw the interview he had with luke and the guy is beyond delusional. First off, luke starts by saying that tom asks to see the pictures luke has taken of him and deletes the ones he doesn't like, considering he kept the following one i shudder to think of which ones didn't pass the grade.
(hate to get off the point, as it isn't my style  but here with tom is Austyn Moore who you KNOW is one of those girls who thinks porn is a stepping stone into the mainstream biz, you can almost see into her mind with this picture " omg tom sizemore, he like knows robert deniro and other big stars, now if i only sleep with him he will totally like introduce me to deniro and like so many casting directors and other important people and maybe by like 2011 i will be nominated for my 1st oscar then i will teach my alcoholic father who said id never amount to anything as he blew his load on my face wrong)
Anyways back to the point, heres the part that kills me
Luke: "How has this [porn] tape affected your life?"
Tom: "Hmm. The fortunate thing..."
Tom turns to Aly Drummond. "How would you say this without being crude?"
Aly: "You can be crude to Luke."
Tom: "Could you do this for me?"
Aly: "Sure. It makes him really popular with the ladies."
Tom: "Because..."
Aly: "He has a massive penis. A big cock."
NOWWWWWWWWWW I haven't seen the actual movie itself but i have seen screen shots and a running commentary of the movie (im pissed that i couldn't find it because its fucking hilarious). But id rank sizemores member between max hardcores and alex sanders, in other words the dudes rigged like a poodle. How he could actually BELIEVE that he is hung is beyond a 10 year addiction to meth and pills. (btw jersey jaxin is in the sizemore porn, i see he spares no expense when it comes to his whores, it set him back two of the blue ones and cab fare to and from the hotel)
Luke: "How have your peers in Hollywood reacted to you about this [porn tape]?"
Tom: "I don't, frankly, give a f---. But they all like it. In all seriousness."
(translation, no one is responding to my calls and his career is in the toilet, but hey im here at the hustler store with my fucking agent lying about my penis size, lifes good, right?)
"Do you know what affected my career? That stupid f---ing bitch [Heidi] Fleiss. She affected my career. And she couldn't even f--- worth a s---. And not the one you're thinking of. Not Heidi Fleiss. Heidi Nice. I can't help it."
(yes it was heidi that killed your career, not the fact you beat on women, are baked out of your mind 11 months a year or get caught acting like a demonic crack baby on a porn video demanding the girls cum 14 seconds after jumping on your poodle cock and squirt in your mouth,wait a minute, whats that? I hear spielbergs on the phone offering you the role of lovable dad in his new family movie. PLEASE)
Anyway im not going further into his interview because you basically know the path its going down, its everyone elses fault but mine, yada yada yada, everyone loves me, it was her not me. Monkey out.
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“I'm gonna open his hole like this. Please excuse my French. I'm gonna make him suffer... He's a nice, a nice kid. He's a pretty kid, too. I mean I don't know, I gotta problem if I should fuck him or fight him." Deniro & Brandon Irons
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Willie D
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Porn Jesus
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Reged: 09/20/05
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Posts: 7106
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Brass Monkey...it gets better. The funniest thing about this interview is that it should have never happened. Accurding to LF, Quote:
Eon McKai called me late Thursday on Joanna's behalf, asking me to come to tonight's show. I immediately called Joanna. She asked me to just write about her tonight.
And LF continues to write about everything but her. Sorry, Tatoo Joo, you time is up. When you play second-fiddle to a guy who faked a urine test using something called the "Whizzinator," you are low-rate porn material. God forbid what will pass your two firing dendrites if Sarah Michelle Gellar comes up to Luke and wants to talk about her endomytriosis. 
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Smelly Monkey
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Porn Jesus
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Reged: 01/26/04
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Posts: 8384
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Loc: In a k1ng like state of mediocrity
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No i didn't say it was the funniest i was just amazed at the delusional state the man is in. Ive book a longshot scene, amazing, i wanted to kill myself directly after, i'll probably end up pairing him up with one of the dirtiest girls i can find giving him a 50/50 shot at catching something that will sting some part of his body the next day.
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“I'm gonna open his hole like this. Please excuse my French. I'm gonna make him suffer... He's a nice, a nice kid. He's a pretty kid, too. I mean I don't know, I gotta problem if I should fuck him or fight him." Deniro & Brandon Irons
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Willie D
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Porn Jesus
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Reged: 09/20/05
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BTW...is the look that Norwood Longshot is going for these days...
Because trying to go Travis Bickle right after you've gone "Neil Pye" from the BBC's Young Ones usually doesn't work. 
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2cums
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Registered Sex Offender
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Reged: 04/16/04
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Posts: 2427
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Loc: On the Mia Rose bandwagon
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Monkey, you summed up everything quite well. Hollyweird will be much safer once Sizemore OD's
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" Bitch, not even a dumptruck full of Gucci bags would get me to do you. "- Gia Jordan response to pornactorforhire
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You know something's wrong with someone when they think they've scored big time by giving up a decent career as a supporting actor in mainstream movies, where money is primo, to being the actor who took too many drugs, and had too many hookers, and became this year's latest junk-novelty.
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pretty
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Chronic Masturbator
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Reged: 03/29/08
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Posts: 1946
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Loc: colorado
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aw but i love tom sizemore
hes such a hot mess!
so this is monkey stuff? i laughed really hard i thinik i peed a little...
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"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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Willie D
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Porn Jesus
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Reged: 09/20/05
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Quote:
so this is monkey stuff? i laughed really hard i thinik i peed a little...
I hope you used the Whizzinator, Tom did.
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Newports
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Quasarman Wannabe
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Reged: 04/16/08
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Loc: CO
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I had no idea who Tom Sizemore was until reading this. Actually, I still have no idea.
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inebriated kiwi
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alt.porn fag
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Reged: 12/25/08
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Quote:
I had no idea who Tom Sizemore was until reading this. Actually, I still have no idea.
He was in Heat and Saving Private Ryan amongst other films...good actor.
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pretty
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Chronic Masturbator
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Reged: 03/29/08
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Posts: 1946
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Loc: colorado
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hes max in strange days 
Quote:
I had no idea who Tom Sizemore was until reading this. Actually, I still have no idea.
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"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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Darrah
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Human Garbage
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Reged: 07/07/08
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Loc: Hell
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Had a reality show too about a year ago. Still won't stop complaining about Heidi Fleiss and blames all his problems on her.
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Bill Hicks
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Kid Vegas Wannabe
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Loc: Off the mortal coil
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Quote:
hes max in strange days
Quote:
I had no idea who Tom Sizemore was until reading this. Actually, I still have no idea.
You actually watched that movie? Thought I was the only one. 
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Quote:
^^^^^^^^^^Truer words never spoken....
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Smelly Monkey
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Porn Jesus
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Reged: 01/26/04
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Posts: 8384
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Loc: In a k1ng like state of mediocrity
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What an odd thread to bring back from the dead 
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“I'm gonna open his hole like this. Please excuse my French. I'm gonna make him suffer... He's a nice, a nice kid. He's a pretty kid, too. I mean I don't know, I gotta problem if I should fuck him or fight him." Deniro & Brandon Irons
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pretty
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Chronic Masturbator
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Reged: 03/29/08
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Posts: 1946
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Loc: colorado
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fuck yeah i watched it
own it
love it
favorite movie ever!
ralph feinnes at his foxiest, juliette lewis in chaninmail, and a stalker homeinvasion rape scene?
please
that shits classic!
Quote:
Quote:
hes max in strange days
Quote:
I had no idea who Tom Sizemore was until reading this. Actually, I still have no idea.
You actually watched that movie? Thought I was the only one.
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"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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